Home - The Testimony of Zuzana Harciníková

Foreword from Pastor Michael

Our testimonies in Christ are so important! They are living proof of God’s love and power and the evidence of His current works among us.  Furthermore, The Word of God tells us that believers “have conquered [the enemy] by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony" (Revelation 12:11).  At Harvest St. Louis we try to make testimonies a part of our worship quite often.  Here is one that was recently given by a young woman from the Czech Republic, Zuzana Harciníková.  She first came to us with a student vocal ensemble in the fall of 2009 as part of our international outreach ministry called the Czech Symphony Project.  If you’d like to learn more about this worship evangelism ministry, please click here.  Zuzana’s testimony was first given in English as part of the Sunday morning message on August 15, 2010.  If you’d like to listen to the message and the testimony please click here. The original version of the written testimony in the Czech language is included at the end of this English transcript.

 

Zuzana Harciníková - Moje svedectví (My Testimony)

 

To be honest, I never thought I could stand before you and speak. I used to be so scared of speaking even to just a few people – and especially in English!  Now I know that I am not standing here for me, but with much gratitude I am standing here for Jesus. I am so grateful that He rescued me from the darkness in which I used to live and that He totally changed my life. 

 

I used to be so depressed that I did not even wanted to get out of bed. I felt very lonely because I had a bad relationship with my family.  The devil also used my despair against me and tried to throw me into the pit. I wanted to end my life because I did not have any purpose for living it.  I so longed for real love, but I looked for it in all the wrong places.  I looked for comfort in different religions, in drinking with friends and in worldly relationships.  I so wanted to believe in something.  I had such a desire to live a beautiful life, but in my own power I was not able to fulfill it.  Often I fell into such fits of rage that I would be suddenly thrown down on the ground kicking and screaming.  A tiny weak voice within my soul was crying out for help as from the darkest prison. Yet, even then Jesus already had a plan for me. 

 

Back in the Czech Republic, I was a member of a student vocal group called, "Everybody's Singing." God made it happen that we were invited to come to America to sing in different churches and hear the Word of God proclaimed. I had no idea what to expect, but in my heart I had this one great desire: I wished that when I was up in the airplane - high above the ocean - I could somehow leave all my burdens in the heavens above and then step out of the plane free from all my dark thoughts. Perhaps this sounds naive, but in a sense this really happened.  Jesus, who is high above, offered to take all my burdens away from me and welcome me in America with His open arms.  During my stay here with all of you I experienced such love that I began asking myself: 'How is this possible?' I noticed that people spoke about Jesus and prayed.  I am sure that they also had their problems, but because of Jesus they knew how to fight back. I saw the light in their eyes and I began to desire to have this light in me as well.

 

During our visit, I was staying with the Pijuts.  About two hours before our flight back I realized that I lost my passport somewhere. I told Mike about it, who was like a father to me, and he - instead of frantically looking for it as people would normally do – offered first to pray.  He saw this as the most effective way to help.  The passport was found and someone brought it to the airport in time for the flight.  I began to cry.  I think this was the first moment I felt Jesus in my heart.  I wanted Him to stay there forever.  Everything in my life changed.  I am so filled with joy now because I can see that life makes sense when we live it for Jesus.  He is there for us in every circumstance, even though we don’t deserve it.  I decided to put to death my old self and ask Jesus to give me a new life. Along with that, I ended a relationship with my Muslim boyfriend.  I had an airplane ticket purchased to go to live with him in Turkey, but I threw it in the trash.  After that I fell down again,  this time not in a fit of rage, but in repentance before the Lord begging Him for forgiveness.  Just as it is written in Psalm 32, verse 5 – "I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, 'I will confess my transgressions to the Lord' - and you forgave the guilt of my sin."

 

Before I finish, I would like to share something that happened to me recently.  A few days ago we went water skiing.  A young girl was there with us who, like me, was just a beginner.  She is 10 years younger than me but was learning really fast, just as fast as me.  I remembered that in the past when Jesus was not in my heart I would have been very jealous of her and probably would have wished for her to fall off her skis.  But at that time I realized one very important thing: Our value is not in our skills or what we excel in – such things are impressive to people, but not to God.  Our value is in being God’s children.  That‘s the greatest value of all. And if we have abilities to do some things well, we don’t have to give them up, but rather use them to glorify God.  In no way, however, do our abilities define us. We are defined by His salvation and by being loved by God.

 

Moje svedectví (Czech version)

 

Abych se priznala, tak sama od sebe bych se sem postavit pred vás nikdy nešla. Mela jsem hruzu mluvit treba jen pred 5-ti lidmi, natož v anglictine. Ale vím, že to nedelám kvuli sobe, ale kvuli Ježíši, a díky Ježíši. Díky tomu, že me vytáhl z temnoty, ve které jsem žila, a tak neuveritelne zmenil moji povahu.

 

Mela jsem deprese, že se mi ani nechtelo vstát z postele. Cítila jsem se hrozne osamelá, protože moje vztahy s rodinou byly špatné. A dábel využil moji citlivosti a snažil se me svrhnout do propasti. Nechtelo se mi žít, protože jsem nevidela smysl, proc tu být. Toužila jsem po lásce, ale hledala jsem na špatném míste. Útechu jsem hledala v jiných náboženstvích, v chození s práteli do hospody, ve svetských vztazích. Chtela jsem necemu verit. Mela jsem krásnou predstavu o živote, ale z vlastní síly jsem ji nedokázala naplnit. Byla jsem casto vzteklá, z nicehonic sebou práskla o zem, zacala jecet a do všeho kopat. A malá dušicka uvnitr me volala o pomoc, protože tam byla nekde hluboko zavrená jak ve vezení. Ale Ježíš už v té chvíli mel pro me plán.

 

Zpívala jsem ve vokálním oktetu a On chtel, abychom jeli do Ameriky, kde budeme zpívat v kostelích a kde budu moct uslyšet Slovo. Netušila jsem, co všechno me v Americe ceká, ale mela jsem jedno velké prání. Až budu v letadle nad oceánem, tak tam nahore v nebesích nechat všechny moje starosti a na nové pude pristát volná od všech cerných myšlenek. Mohlo to vypadat jako naivní prání, ale ono se to doopravdy stalo. Tam nahore byl Ježíš a všechno to trápení ode mne odehnal. A tady v Americe už stál s otevrenou nárucí. A mezi vámi jsem tu videla tolik lásky a ptala jsem se sama sebe, cím to je. Lidé tu mluvili o Ježíši, modlili se. Meli své starosti, ale díky Ježíši se s nimi umeli poprat. Videla jsem svetlo v jejich ocích a chtela jsem ho mít také...

 

Poslední den naší návštevy tady, dve hodiny pred odletem, jsem zjistila, že jsem nekde ztratila pas. Rekla jsme to tatkovi – Mikovi, a ten místo toho, aby zacal hledat, kde by mohl být, delal veci, které lidé normálne v takových situacích delají – on se zacal se mnou modlit a videl to jako nejlepší pomoc. A já zacala brecet. Myslím, že to byl okamžik, kdy jsem Ježíše poprvé cítila ve svém srdci. A ted už ho nikdy nechci nechat odejít. Protože v mém živote se vše zmenilo. Jsem štastná. A hlavne vidím, že tohle všechno má smysl, pokud tu chcem žít pro Ježíše, který je tu pro nás za každách okolností, ackoli si to vubec nezasloužíme. Rozhodla jsem se pohrbít svuj starý život a nechat Ježíše, aby ho nahradil novým. Ukoncila jsem vztah s prítelem z Turecka a letenku, kterou jsem mela koupenou, hodila do koše. Padla jsem na zem, ale tentokrát ne vzteky, ale s hlubokým plácem, a prosila o odpuštení. Jak je psáno v Žalmech 32.kapitole, 5. verši: Bože, priznal jsme svuj hrích a odkryl pred tebou své špatnosti. A Tys mi odpustil a smazal špatnosti i mé viny..

 

Chtela bych vám ríct ješte malou príhodu. Predevcírem jsme byli na vodních lyžích. Byla tam s námi dívka, která stejne jako já s lyžema zacínala. Je o 10 let mladší, ale šlo jí to skoro stejne rychle jako mne. A já vím, nemít Ježíše v srdci, tak strašne žárlím a možná bych jí i prála, aby z tech lyží spadla. Ale predevcírem jsem pochopila jednu vec – naše prednosti nevezí v tom, v cem jsme dobrý, v cem vynikáme, jak težká je naše práce, protože to nám je jen k tomu, když chcem najít prízen u lidí. Naše prednost je v tom, že jsme Boží deti. To má tu nejvetší hodnotu. A pokud jsme v necem dobrý, neznamená to, že to musíme zahodit, ale použijme to pro oslavu Boží. V žádném prípade na tom ale nestavme naší hodnotu. Protože ta spocívá v tom, že jsme spaseni. Že jsme milováni Bohem.